As our bloated and beaten bodies trudge toward the end of this dreadful year, there are things to be thankful for. First and foremost: Freak fights are alive and well in the year of our lord 2020.
Tonight (Sat., Nov. 28, 2020) — in front of no fans inside STAPLES Center in Los Angeles, Calif., and an ungodly amount of humans (allegedly) on pay-per-view (PPV) — we get a card of certified freak fights that would make any Pride FC fan weep tears of joy. It’s an amalgam of the the American experience, as legacy fighters, fighters with legacies, some YouTube COVID-19 denier, and a former NBA slam dunk champion will be fighting on the same card as *reads notes* ... Badou Jack of all people.
The main event — the fight that has eluded us for nearly 20 years — Mike Tyson vs. Roy Jones Jr. This is going to be weird to watch, it’s going to be surreal to commentate, and furthermore, does anyone even know the damn rules to this fight? They’ve changed more times than at one point I swear the fight was going to be in Dothan or end up like the Detroit dumpster fire known as Shamrock vs. Severn.
This all tracks because the WBC is running the show. The WBC at one point was (probably still is) the defining governing body in boxing, with Ali, Foreman, Tyson, and others fighting for their titles. But, as boxing evolves into whatever the hell it is now, the WBC and its President, Mauricio Sulaiman, are clout chasers. If you remember the Conor McGregor-Floyd Mayweather fight, it had a special belt made for that. For Canelo-GGG’s series of fights, it had special belts made for them, too. Hell, if Canelo moved his bowels at any point, the WBC had a belt ready.
So the fact that there is a WBC “Frontline Belt” being awarded to …. someone? We really don’t know if there’s going to be a winner; therefore, I’m going judge the fight and come up with my own winner.
Tonight, Steven James will be my guest co-host as two pieces of Brooklyn street trash take to the mic and call this fight. Stephanie Sottile will be modding as usual, and Olive the puppy will be giving her own bark-by-bark, as well as taking action on how many times Jake Paul acts like a jerk off.
Come join us at 8:45 p.m. ET for full coverage for what could be the boxing equivalent of the Hindenburg disaster or a fun night of nostalgia and face punching. Either way, you want to know what’s happening. So join the party!
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