Need Help from this community with…… parenting?

Why the hell am I asking the savages at MMAmania for parenting advice?

Well, mostly because among my circle of peers, I have the oldest child by quite a margin and I really hate PC culture and SJW’s so asking anywhere else online is gonna yield skewed results. At least with all you maniacs, I’m gonna get some honest and unfiltered opinions. Plus I’m hopeful that some of you have daughters and have already scaled this particular mountain.

I’ll try to keep it short.

I have an 11 year old daughter and she got an old used phone without a SIM for Christmas. Outside of a PSvita (portable playstation console) this is her first full access internet device. I didn’t really want to give her a phone but her friends all have one and she’s been begging for over a year so… Christmas present.

I busted her on the device after bed time one night and took it away. Before giving her the phone, I register my thumb print in case I needed access. She knew that she wasn’t supposed to use the thing after bed time so when I took it away, I needed to know what she was doing that would have her up past bed time, in the dark and under the covers in her room.

So yeah… a little heart breaking to find that my little 11 year old angel is searching for various porn and finding her way to PornHub and other such sites. She even turned off the safe search I had enabled on the search engine. More disturbing is that there was a history for and two newly created profiles complete with fake pictures, one looking for men and one for women. Of course, she’s gotten dick pics and vile messages and has read them… her innocence is gone now. L

I’m working through a divorce but will have to pull the mother in on the conversation or confrontation, depending on how we decide to approach it. We’re gonna do something about it tomorrow evening so now I’m just trying to decide on how to handle the situation.

Has anyone on the site dealt with this kind of thing in their family? Perhaps someone is a social worker or psychologist that can lend some insight? Even just general opinions are welcome as a broad consensus would be helpful in terms of gauging reactions and fall out.

At first I was mad and wanted to give her a lecture… but I’m starting to think that would push her away and I want her to be able to talk to me about "stuff". There is nothing wrong with being sexually curious but getting your education from PornHub is probably not the best resource. I was also wanting to tell her that her curiosity is normal but there must be safer ways for her to explore her sexuality… I just have no idea what those ways might be?

Thanks for any help. It’s a touchy subject so I understand if there isn’t much feedback (PM me though if you have something to say and just don’t want to say it publicly). I’m feeling pretty awkward about it myself but feel that I have to do something and need to tread lightly as this could be a turning point in our relationship where trust is broken forever… and that scares me too. I just want to do the right thing here so sleeping on it and getting some feedback at least gives me perspective so I can help my daughter and keep her safe at the same time.