I’m very, very disappointed in Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) middleweight contender Ronaldo Souza, who turned his back on the cueball community by transforming his dome into a Brazilian chia pet.
Traitor.
When people make fun of my slightly receding hairline, I bring their attention to some of the most badass baldies in history, like basketball deity Michael Jordan, wrestling icon “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, and of course, acting legend Telly Savalas.
Don’t come at me with that Kojak crap, Savalas played Archer Maggott in Dirty Dozen four years before his role in A Town Called Bastard.
Case-fucking-closed.
Anyway, Old Man Souza, 38, is currently adding more sod to the fairway while he’s not throwing hands inside the cage. “Jacare” (25-6, 1 NC) could probably use the break after getting edged out by Kelvin Gastelum at UFC 224 last May.
The loss dropped him to No. 5 in the official rankings, but no question a big win in his Octagon return will have him back in the 185-pound title hunt.
Hair and all.
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