Episode six of The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) 8 is off and running and with a wholesome title like "Fight, Fight, Kill, Kill" it's no surprise that Junie Browning is once again at the forefront of another show.
After the requisite recap from last week that highlights Eliot Marshall's win over Shane Primm, Team Blue coach Frank Mir asks Junie Browning to dispose of Roli Delgado. That prompts Browning to refer to Delgado as a nerd with no entertainment value and no purpose on the show.
Fortunately for Junie the TUF mansion wasn't constructed out of glass.
A game Delgado is more than happy to oblige and like most viewers at home is curious as to why Junie Browning is so highly regarded.
Coach Mir drops by the house to celebrate Marshall's win with the rest of Team Blue. After a few drinks and some laughs, Mir decides to call out Roli Delgado for having a mail-order black belt in jiu-jitsu.
When Mir asks for the details regarding his presentation, Delgado goes into the six degrees of separation and starts rattling off names of people nobody has ever seen or heard of.
Delgado starts to pick up steam and what starts out as a simple explanation turns into Kevin Spacey's monologue from The Usual Suspects.
I never did figure out where his black belt came from but I'm pretty sure his instructor was in that Barbershop Quartet back in Skokie, Illinois.
Afterwards, Junie tries to get into Delgado's head with a barrage of insults and even offers him a deal where all Roli has to do is survive the first round to be declared the winner.
Where can I get in on that action?
Delgado is unfazed and admires Junie's ability to have some athletic ability coupled with the brain of a peacock.
Later at the fight announcement, Junie throws a black belt at Delgado's feet and spits on it. Off to the side, Coach Nogueira instantly disintegrates like he just stared into the Ark of the Covenant.
Even Mir is a little offended by the stunt and a visibly disturbed Anderson Silva politely tells Delgado to kick Junie's ass.
During a Team Red training session, Coach Stankie decides to take it upon himself to guarantee Delgado the victory by growling incoherently and dressing like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.
Delgado's inability to conquer the timing of the speed bag has me wondering if his striking resume is as convoluted as his jiu-jitsu's.
Still, his training looks like the Olympic trials next to Junie's, which from what we've seen thus far consists of him waltzing around an empty gym shadowboxing in the Octagon.
At the weigh-ins, a chipper Delgado hits 155 without batting an eyelash. Browning on the other hand comes in at 158 with only an hour to do something about it. Coach Mir drops a few F-bombs and seems to have finally lost his patience with Junie's laundry list of problems.
Browning gets dressed up in some garbage bags and hits the treadmill and follows that up with the stationary bike in the Nevada sunlight. Junie struggles mightily but is able to gut it out and squeeze in at 156.
Team Nogueira’s Roli Delgado (7-3-1) vs. Team Mir’s Junie Browning (2-0)
Round 1: Browning comes forward aggressively. Delgado with a front kick that gets caught and Browning leg sweeps him. Back to their feet and Delgado puts together a nice combo that includes a jumping knee and a two-punch combo. Browning takes him to the fence. They struggle for position until Browning backs away. Delgado lands a combo. Delgado with back-to-back low kicks and a left jab that lands. Browning absorbs a body shot and a leg kick and then answers with one of his own. Browning is pushing the pace but Delgado is using it to effectively counterstrike. Browning with a leg kick and a front kick. Delgado tags him with a left and then shoots but Browning lands on top of him. They scramble but Browning seems content to let him back to his feet. Browning eggs him on so Delgado clocks him in the face but then misses with a slow knee that Browning catches and dumps him on the floor. Delgado lands a spinning back fist and Browning answers with a hard one-two punch. Then another. They clinch and Delgado scores an upward knee. They go to the fence as time expires. Close round but I give it to Delgado.
Round 2: Browning eats a jab and answers with a hard body shot. Delgado shoots and gets rejected. Browning blasts him with a left and then another body shot. Delgado goes for the takedown and Browning scurries away. Browning lands some brutal body shots and Delgado starts to look sluggish and non-committal. Browning peppers the legs with kicks. Delgado sneaks in the occasional jab but not much else. Delgado gets hammered with five unanswered punches to the face and a leg kick. A crushing right dumps Delgado to the floor. Browning pounces but Delgado tangles him up and prevents the finish. Browning backs away and Delgado is able to immediately get to his feet. Delgado showing a ton of heart. Browning lands a low kick and a jab but both fighters look gassed. The striking starts to get a little sloppy on both sides as they suck wind. Delgado hulks up and unleashes a late flurry but it's not enough to save the round. Round 2 is all Browning.
Round 3: Browning opens with a leg kick. Delgado answers with a jab. Hard low kick by Browning. Delgado is landing the jab but Browning responds with much harder shots. Both fighters going in with flurries and backing out to get their wind back. Glancing backfist by Browning. Delgado fires off a front kick that Browning once again catches and Delgado falls to the floor. Browning just kind of hovers over him for a while and finally kicks the leg. Time is running down and not much is happening with Delgado on his back. Delgado snaps up rather quickly and they are back to trading blows. Nice jab and headshot by Delgado. Another Delgado jab and failed front kick but he stays upright. Three straight kicks by Delgado and a jab by Browning as time expires. Very close round but I give it to Browning based on damage inflicted.
Junie Browning defeats Roli Delgado via split-decision.
After the fight Junie expresses his disgust at his own performance for failing to finish the fight and back up all the jibber-jabber he's subjected us to for the past six weeks. He also apologizes to Coach Nogueira for disgracing the black belt and Coach Mir tries to hint that it was the producers egging him on in an effort to make good television.
Delgado is disappointed and wanted the win but is no doubt consoled when Stankie tell him that he loves him. Coach Nogueira admires Delgado's heart and is not bothered by the loss because Roli went in and gave it his best effort.
The fight had its moments but after the dog and pony show we sat through with Junie Browning since day one I don't know how he can be considered a threat going into the semis. His fight was practically all striking and he nearly lost to a guy who couldn't hit the speedbag two days before the fight.
I can only hope this performance humbles him and we get to focus on something or someone other than Junie going forward.
Doubtful, but here's to hoping.
Stay tuned next week as Team Mir trains in scuba gear and puts their manhood on ice, Team Nogueira plays monkey in the middle and the house pranks are taken to a whole new level.
See you in seven!
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