WARNING! The following may be disturbing and is not intended for the faint of heart . The following may also contain spoilers, so if you strive for the element of surprise in your life, please do not read on.
This Saturday, on September 22nd 2012, the epidemic will begin.
You've heard about it around your grocery stores, in the libraries, at the local pub, at your daughters preschool, the glory hole down in Flint, Michigan and soon this rumor will become reality. What is this rumor you ask? Well please allow me to elaborate..
Lately on Mania you may have seen a string of articles filled with Jones hate propaganda, justified perhaps but still a ridiculous amount. These posts have stirred up many Maniacs, causing random outbursts of "Fuck Jones!" and statements challenging his masculinity, especially in random articles (seems to be mainly ones relating to Hettes). Well Maniacs I have some good news, this is only the beginning..
Inside sources, which for obvious reasons I can not name who, have indicated something revolutionary will happen at the event they call UFC 152. Vitor Belfort may have, or may not have, hinted at the possibility of dumping a load in the beard of an unconscious Jones post fight. What you ask? Allow me to clarify:
Vitor Belfort will KO Jones and then to proceed to cum in his beard.
I didn't stutter maniacs and this isnt one of those hidden camera shows, this is real life. Vitor Belfort will empty his semen tank into the vast beard of Bones. My sources are about 99% accurate and I can almost guarantee this one is happening, so please for the sake of the children, cover all virgin eyes.
Which leads me to my next point...today is the mark of a revolution. Join myself and Jonnyboy6969 AKA Mr. man that knows a thing or two about blastin asses in the revolution that will change the face of MMA. We say fuck Jon Jones and his nickname "Bones". Once Vitor treats him like the cum dumpster he is we shall dub him Jon "CumBeard" Jones.
What do you say Maniacs? Join us in this cum filled extravaganza, let out the hatred and let these threads get hot and sticky. Again let us dub Jones Jon "CumBeard" Jones.
Jonnyboy6969 queue the cum beard cake and lets all fuck Jones!