I have to imagine a good portion of our audience just erupted in applause.

That's because Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) President Dana White recently revealed a phone conversation he had with his former heavyweight champion, and it looks like the wear-and-tear of mixed martial arts (MMA) would be too much for the part-time professional wrestler.

From the Dave & Mahoney Radio Show (via Heavy.com):

"There's so many new up-and-coming guys right now, which is very exciting. Bigfoot Silva looked good in his last fight so yes, the heavyweight division looks awesome. He's done. He called me a couple days ago. He's never coming back. He just said he can wrestle, but he can't fight. He was contemplating coming back. Neither is Fedor. They're both retired."

Rumors of his inevitable return began circulating when Lesnar was spotted rubbing elbows with his former cage-fighting brethren at the UFC 146: "Dos Santos vs. Mir" Memorial Day Weekend event at the MGM Grand back in May. Then White, who appeared anxious to re-sign him, went and trolled polled the fans to see if a "super fight" opposite Fedor Emelianenko was still of interest.

Moot point, as "The Last Emperor" also appears to be gone for good.

The 35-year-old Lesnar, who called it quits following back-to-back drubbings against Cain Velasquez (UFC 121) and Alistair Overeem (UFC 141), was clearly in the twilight of an already brief career when he retired from MMA after battling diverticulitis.

He finished with just a 5-3 record, but his 2009 win against Frank Mir is still considered the high-water mark for UFC pay-per-view (PPV) buys at over one million.

Who's mad and who's glad?