The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) 9: Episode 7 recap and discussion

Episode seven of The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) 9 gets underway with a Team UK training session and Dave Faulkner is doing the worm. Somewhere in Westbrook, Maine, Scott Garland is suing for royalties. The cameras poll some of the Brits and they all concur that Dave can win it all because he excels in every area.

Even wrestling!

At the TUF house, Richie Whitson introduces the gang to impetigo, which is basically scabs gone wild. Jason Pierce takes a can of Lysol and douses the quarters with a spray-on defense.

Team USA hits the gym and Jason Pierce -- who is slated to meet Dave Faulkner later in the show -- starts complaining about broken blood vessels in his foot. He trains bouncing around on one leg like Zach Gowan until Hendo tells him to hit the bench. The seeds of withdrawal are already being planted.

Bisping thinks it would be a swell idea to have the guys bash tractor tires with giant sledgehammers. What he fails to realize is that unless you've logged some serious hours under the sledge, it can be a tricky piece of equipment to negotiate.

When all is said and done, Andre takes a piece out of the mats, Dean throws an airball and Faulkner smashes himself in the leg like he's trying to ring that little bell at the carnival.

Apparently "The Count" overestimated the dexterity of his team.

When the Yanks arrive there seems to be an equipment failure. Jason Pierce doesn't have his cup -- or the will to succeed -- since every task he's presented with draws a scowl and a complaint.

Coach Cyrille calls him a pain in the neck. Hendo responds with three complete sentences -- a personal best for this season.

Pierce hits the showers without finishing his training and the rest of the team thinks he's afraid of Faulkner and starting to unravel.

The downstairs room at TUF manor has been labeled the "bash room" because it's where the haters congregate to talk trash about whichever fighter happens to be absent from the group. Lester begins to confront the bashers but then quickly scurries off, presumably to get to second period French before the bell rings.

On the other side of town, Faulkner is late for practice after having a lump in his shin treated following the hammer fiasco.

Both teams are called to some nearby tennis courts for the much anticipated "Coaches Challenge." On tap? You guessed it, a friendly game of tennis. As usual, winning coach gets 10g and his crew gets 1.5k a piece.

Mercifully, Dana modifies the tennis rules to allow each Coach the ability to serve outside the lines. First to six games wins and the winner must win by two games.

As expected, both Coaches are absolutely dreadful with the rackets. Hendo gaffes on the first serve but rebounds to take the game one. He then masters the serve and goes up 2-0. Bisping is starting to crack under the relentless trash talk from Team US. "The Count" squeaks out two wins to make it 2-5 but can't sustain his momentum and goes down in the next set.

Afterward, Bisping seems more upset that Damarques Johnson was shooting his mouth off than he was at losing in tennis. That my friends, is a fighter.

Fight announcement pits lightweights Ross Pearson vs. Richie Whitson.

A "4th and Long" commercial introduces us to the term "Slapdick Operation." Thumbs up from this viewer. Unfortunately it's followed up by that annoying Subway commercial that features a montage of American Idol rejects trying to sing A Capella.

I decide to watch the remainder of the episode from the comfort of my idling car -- with a potato in my tailpipe.

Back to business and Whitson gives us the "I'm from a small town" speech. He works on his striking but not his ability to take a fall as he does an Irvin-Southworth right out the cage door and onto the floor.

Later that night, Coach Henderson brings Whitson a cake for his birthday and Cameron Dollar spoils the good cheer by bawling on the balcony over past due bills and going home to Mom and Pop. Lester seems slightly amused over the whole incident.

At the weigh-ins, both fighters hit their mark. Dana White labels it "The Pitbull" vs. "The Scrappy Snowboarder." Dah-dum-dum.

Ross Pearson does a hard sparring session with Bisping -- just long enough to burn the time necessary to assure me we aren't going to see Jason Pierce face off against Dave Faulkner.

Lightweight elimination fight #3: Ross Pearson (9-3) vs. Richie Whitson (4-0)

Round 1: Kick lands for Whitson and they clinch. They go to the cage and struggle for a bit before pushing off. Whitson misses a big head kick and Pearson takes him down hard. Whitson stands up and they exchange. Huge knee from Pearson and Whitson tries for a guillotine and gets slammed for his efforts. Pearson throws another huge knee -- unfortunately Whitson was downed and it was illegal. Referee Herb Dean allows Whitson time to recover and deducts a point from Pearson. They resume and throw hands. Whitson misses a kick. And again -- and this time gets pushed to the cage. Pearson with another huge takedown. Whitson stands up and gets taken down yet again. Pearson takes his back and works for the choke but transitions to an armbar and taps him out. Total domination by Pearson.

Ross Pearson defeated Richie Whitson via submission (armbar)

Whitson doesn't make any excuses for the loss and Pearson is ready to rumble some more.

Stay tuned next week as American morale hits a new low, the Brits get bitten by the injury bug and Pierce has to decide whether or not he wants to be an F-ing fighter.

See you in seven!