The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) 8: Episode 5 recap and discussion

Episode five of The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) 8 gets underway and surprisingly enough we get to enjoy an episode that doesn't begin with the immature antics of Junie Browning.

Well not really, but it felt good to pretend for a few seconds.

Anyway, the guest appearance by current UFC middleweight champion Anderson "The Spider" Silva should easily cleanse away the grimy residue left on our collective consciousness by Junie's previous screen time.

Having said that, we pick right up from last week when Loco Ono vaulted into the cage to confront a victorious Efrain Escudero and falls right into the waiting arms of coach Antonio Nogueira.

Probably not the person you want to have restraining you - unless of course you list "passing out" as one of your favorite hobbies.

Junie is led out of the cage after embarrassing himself and ruining what happened to be a very entertaining fight between Escudero and Nelson. Dana White cites the absence of Director of Nevada Athletic Commission Keith Kizer as the only reason Junie was not expelled for cage diving.

As if Dana was unable to make that call.

Back in the Team Mir locker room, Junie references his ability to go "From chill to kill" in a matter of seconds. Unfortunately no one in the locker room is impressed save for Shane Nelson, who just happened to get choked out due to a lack of oxygen only minutes before.

For some reason their budding relationship reminds me of the Danny Abbaddi-Matt Hamill sandwich making fiasco from season three.

Team Nogueira is celebrating Escudero's win and their camaraderie appears to be contagious. A stark contrast to the somber mood of Team Mir.

After Coach Mir warns Junie for his behavior, we end up back at the house where Junie gets a secondary lecture from a bathing Shane Primm. Junie admits that coming on the show is the worst decision he's ever made.

Well if it's any consolation Mr. Browning, it's no picnic on this end either.

Now that we're all bored to tears from the Junie Browning experiment the producers wisely rescue us from channel surfing with the arrival of Anderson Silva. As expected, the red team scurries after him to the cliff of punishment like the good little lemmings that they are.

Silva gets in the cage and mixes it up with a couple of the guys and Ryan Bader in particular is allowed take a few extra liberties on The Spider. Afterwards, Bader claims that Silva was sparring pretty hard, which of course we all know is bologna since Bader still has the innate ability to chew solid foods.

How feared is The Spider? Well John Polakowski, the man who hugs everybody, didn't go within ten feet of Silva.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Krzystof Soszynski and Tom Lawlor raise a few eyebrows by once again fondling the briefs of an opposing fighter - in a bedroom that looks like it was decorated by Sweet Tooth from Twisted Metal.

They explain that as a result of winning his fight, Escudero must now be subjected to the wrath of Team Blue which translates into frozen undies and a bed full of itching powder.

I didn't realize that itching powder was so readily accessible. Perhaps there is a prank closet right next to the liquor closet for mature fighters who just want to relax after a long day with a prank or two.

Unfortunately Soszynski and Lawlor turn out to be the Harry and Lloyd of practical jokes since they eliminate any suspense and build-up by leaving Escudero a detailed note about the missing briefs.

Naturally the undergarments are found and everyone has a "Ha-Ha" moment but the itching powder? Didn't go over very well with Kyle Kingsbury and a few of the other victims. While driving to the fight picks they contemplate a retaliation with such suggestions as vampire ants, broken glass, feces meatballs and arson.

Or as Junie Browning calls it, "Christmas with the folks".

Everyone meets up at the gym and a few of the red shirts are a bit perplexed as to why Coach Nogueira keeps his picks so close to the vest. He makes his announcement and we have Team Red's Shane Primm facing off against Team Blue's Eliot Marshall.

Naturally anything fight related was just a tease as we get right back into the prank-off and Team Red looks to have every blue shirt sleeping with the fishes - literally. They take some canned fish and do a sardine-inspired Basquiat on the walls and beds of Team Blue - who seem more irritated at the lack of imagination then the smell of oily fish.

Vinny Magalhaes on the other hand must have had some kind of tuna-related trauma as a child and storms into the bedroom of Team Red demanding a confession. None is given so he turns Efrain Escudero's bed into a lemonade stand.

Somewhere in TV Land Chris Leben is smiling.

Escudero seems unfazed as he washes his linens and warns of what's to come.

Its time for some training and we get a glimpse of Shane Primm working out with a little extra one-on-one time with Coach Nogueira. Nog predicts Primm by knockout based on his attitude and edge in striking.

On the flip side we have Eliot Marshall gearing up for his big fight and we open with Team Blue exiting the van in a bizarre slow-motion "The Right Stuff" kind of strut.

He trains in the Nevada elements and rattles off a fairly impressive grappling resume - an a not-so-impressive social resume. Coach Mir says that Marshall's "worst animal" is himself.

Either Mir has been logging some serious hours on the Genesis playing Altered Beast or he's got his degree from the Dubya School of Botched Maxims.

Back at the gym, Escudero is caught lying down and when Coach Nogueira stops by to say hello he squeals like a stuck pig. Itching powder, lateritious sediment, the whole enchilada.

Being the good coach that he is, Nog doesn't want any of his guys to miss their beauty sleep and so he takes his case to Coach Mir and asks for his assistance in calling off the pranks.

Mir is unsympathetic and has a "Boys will be boys" mentality.

In the locker room, a flustered Nog vents to his old pal Stankie - who not coincidentally looks like he just crawled out of the heating duct like that old guy from Metallica's "Unforgiven" video.

They decide the best thing to do is just go over Mir's head and talk to Team Blue themselves, which is certainly going to sit well with Mir.

Not that it matters.

Nog tries to have a pow-wow with the group but Team Blue laughs him off and promises to continue with their pranks. While I don't think Nog should have gotten involved, part of me wanted to see him snap and start submitting some of the smug people who weren't paying attention.

After what seems like an eternity we finally get to fight day and since the weigh-ins were not broadcast we must assume that everything is copacetic.

Team Nogueira’s Shane Primm (1-0) vs. Team Mir’s Eliot Marshall (5-1)

Round 1: Marshall opens with a quick combo that gets the attention of a lethargic Primm. Marshal tries again but Primm rushes him and tries to clinch. Marshall uses leverage to take him down. Marshall lands a few bombs and Primm rolls right into a rear naked choke. Marshall is unable to lock it in after several close calls but Primm is unable to roll back into guard and eats the occasional punch. Marshall finally finds the choke and sends Primm tapping at 2:25 of the first. Nice win by Marshall and a very poor showing by Primm.

Eliot Marshall defeats Shane Primm via submission (rear naked choke).

After the fight, a pumped-up Marshall calls out Ryan Bader and then gives a good ribbing to Vinny Magalhaes back in the dressing room. Magalhaes, whose hair changes color faster than the horses in Emerald City, is not amused and starts hulking up.

Vinny is to humor what Junie is to self-control.

For the first time all season Team Red is not all hugs and smiles. A visibly deflated Nogueira has a hard time consoling the devastated Primm and Ryan Bader is pacing the room in a state of uncertainty.

Is the momentum starting to shift to Team Mir?

Stay tuned next week as we finally get to see Junie Browning in the cage as he takes on Team Red's Roli Delgado - who Browning claims got his jiu-jitsu black belt from McDonald's.

Will Browning be able to walk the walk? Or will the "Crazy Cuban" finally shut him up?

See you right here in seven!